I love the smell of when spring season is comin’. When you feel the warmth and the sun is shining. No more freezing and thick coats. The reason why I love summer: wearing less clothes. In this post I am wearing an oversized shirt-dress kinda thing. I love the material of it because it’s very light and neither too short nor too long. Combined it with my all time favorite black boots from H&M and my vintage hat plus this long cardigan I thrifted. It’s perfect for the spring season when it’s still a little cold but warm at the same time. As an ordinary fashion blogger I attanded the fashion week here in Istannbul as you may have noticed from the photos on this post. It was pretty exhausting to handle my job + uni + the fashion shows I was invited to, but it worked out kinda okay. I had the chance to meet lots of people again.. to be a part of it made me feel more confident about my blog.
I know I am not a very good writer. Writing about my style my feelings I get throughout my life can be releasing. We all have our positive and negative experiences. Meeting so many people but to see that actually no one of them is a part of your life. They just come and go. Some wanna stay, but you dont want them to stay or you hold on to some but they dont wanna stay.
‘Go with the flow’ is what I always say to myself.
I’m scared of lonely but at the same time I don’t wanna be surrounded by too many people because they scare me.
I hate being too close with people but at the same time I can be very emotional at one click, if I feel comfortable by the person who is with me.
Then there are times where you just dont wanna care anymore, you just let go and stop feeling.. yeah and then people see you as someone who has no feelings. Like they dont understand and know who you are but judge you by the way you act because you dont wanna care anymore.
I pretty much got used to being on my own and most of the people act surprised when I tell them that I can take care of myself. I don’t need anybody to take care of me, but this doesn’t mean I wanna be totally alone on my own.
People should see each other as human beings and not as woman and man or black and white or gay and hetero. I hate seperating people but I always get confronted with it when I look into the eyes of these people surrounding me in this big city.
I don’t wanna spend the rest of my life in this city. That’s what I learned the last few months going through all my ups and downs here. This is not my place. Really not, but it’s good facing this feeling because I know I dont wanna settle yet. I came from Germany and don’t wanna go back there either. I need a place where people are more relaxed about life where they don’t worry about the next day just living and enjoying life. People here are too much into this whole ‘’ my house, my car, my Money, mine this mine that. They try to impress themselves and the people around them with their posessions. And then? There is probably no place that I am describing :D but at least one which is pretty much close to this where I wanna live..